World Series

It's Monday night and I'm halfway glued to my TV, hoping the SF Giants can clinch the title. Mom, dad, brother and brother's GF attended Game 1 in San Francisco. Brother + 1 attended Game 2 as well. Giants fever has hit almost every Facebook status message I read during the nights they're playing and sometimes, the days they are not. I can almost tell what happened in the games based on the name updates... Sanchez, Cody Ross, Uribe, Buster Posey and the list goes on. More photos and tag lines of "Fear the Beard" arrive daily. It makes me miss home.

I'm not sure the Bay Area will ever not be home. I guess sometimes I'm just waiting for that day. Will I ever stop telling people I'm from SF? Living in Louisville, I often receive a slightly odd look, asking how did you end up here?! These days, I don't even know.

I await anxiously to find out where my next residence will be. In the last two years I've lived in Charlottesville, Atlanta, Louisville and even Stockholm, Sweden for a couple months. Friday, I will know where I move in February 2011. I'm excited and scared. The anxiety has seeped into my dreams as I cross my fingers for Chicago and try to remember that everything happens for a reason. Those dreams can turn to nightmares, so anything I can do to not focus on the next move is good as it hopefully leads to better sleep.

Therefore, bottom of the 7th, Giants lead 3-1. Let's go SF!

Don't Get Too Excited!!

I suppose I should start by announcing that I have accepted a full time position!! While this is very exciting news, it also means that I start work May 24th, which is the day after I graduate. I had dreams about attending the 2010 World Cup in South Africa and traveling the world for the two months prior to joining some unknown firm. Unfortunately, none of these trips will be taken, and I'll settle for a week on the west coast, some time moving and then of course, the silver lining to second year, BEACH WEEK! The good news is, I'm excited about the position and the thought of making $$$ again!!

If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm a planner. Though I'm a planner only in how it relates to plane flights, hotel rooms and transportation to and from the airport. Most trips, I show up and will figure out what I'm doing doing/ seeing when I get there. So here I am planning again. The official communication about beach week reached our inbox today. I'm already trying to figure out how to get to California, move, attend beach week, then graduation and hopefully arrive in my new home in time for Day 1. Plus, maybe a trip to Vegas for Memorial Day Weekend! When I think about the fact that graduation is almost exactly 4 months from today, it seems silly that I'm trying to be so prepared. It's as if I'm ready to return to the states for Q4 and graduate, stepping forward to the next chapter. I can't help but remind myself to not get too excited. I mean this is it, right? No more school. No more living across the street from these friends. No more instant parties with 50 of your closest business school buddies. No more TNDC, first coffee, HBS cases, HBR articles, insanely smart peers, tormenting first years with new Darden cases, and no more stressing about finals and feeling the joy when they're over. It's crazy to think.

So in the meantime, I try to take a breath and keep my feet on the ground, while I contemplate venturing to Rome next weekend with my classmates who are on exchange. Maybe that will remind me that I have quite a few adventures left in this chapter.

Violated

Yesterday was an incredible afternoon spent up North in the heat for a friend's housewarming party. On my way South, my friend and I stopped in SF to meet some friends and discuss the night's festivities. Turns out my friend managed to forget to transfer everything into her purse, including some form of identification. After short deliberation, I let her take my car to pick up her ID so that we could all go out. Roundtrip, the drive is about an hour. I tend to be quite anal about my car and rarely let anyone drive it unless I am in it. Even then, it amounts to less than 1% of my overall driving, but she is a good friend and a good driver, so I entrusted her to be careful.

She returned as quickly as she could and soon enough we were out on the town. It was a great night with the girls and I slept soundly on the slightly slanted futon. Unfortunately, my morning was met with despair when I got to my car. I went to unlock the car and realized that it was already unlocked. At first, I thought nothing of it, but then I opened the door to find what little I had in disarray. Chargers, iPod shuffle, 2 pairs of designer sunglasses, an empty Coach purse and my soccer bag, stolen. It's an incredibly frustrating feeling as I feel in someway it's my fault. I should have either a) gone with her or b) headed home instead of giving her the responsibility. She didn't say much, but she swore she locked it. Indeed, I don't doubt she tried, but it's hard to believe it when all evidence is against it. Additionally, I suppose I'm more comfortable with the thought that my car was open than someone had a magic key that duplicates my remote access.

I'm desperately trying not to be mad at her, though I do feel a lot of frustration towards her and that almost makes me feel guilty. I would have liked a little more remorse or perhaps a couple words of comfort instead of an awkwardly silent drive home. Nothing is irreplaceable, however, the hassle is enough to drive me crazy.

St Thomas, USVI

St Thomas, one word: INCREDIBLE! I spent 7 days on the beach, attended a beautiful wedding of two people who are completely in love, took a boat trip to BVI and shared laughter and smiles with a handful of good friends. Absolutely a perfect trip and to think, I almost missed it all! Enjoy some scenic pictures below...

Darden: My welcome packet arrived while I was away and it all seems so soon. I look at the calendar and wonder where the last 4 weeks went and how quick the next month will go. A list of required and recommended reading was also posted during the week away. I suppose I should finish my last pre-matriculation module and get to the reading. I also need to decide on pre-term classes.

My roommate and I officially receive our apartment this Saturday, though the keys won't be picked up until 4th of July weekend when she moves out there. Starting to feel the shock that I'm actually leaving SF, IMO, one of the greatest cities in the world. Today, I also received an email from a fellow class of 2010 Dardenite who apparently followed my blog through their journey. I'm still in aw over the small world, and internet, for that matter.

Computer: I think I've decided on the Dell D630. The specs are basically the same between that and the T61, but as my dad put it, if you can't decide, buy American! I know it's a silly reason, though it seems logical.

Forte Foundation: Attending the conference next week and trying to figure out what I do with my suit when I head to Germany. I think I may bring a Tyvek envelope with me and mail it home. Thursday night is set aside for dinner and drinks with other attendees, but I'm contemplating missing it and going on a CU Alumni boat trip with a college friend. Maybe that defeats the purpose of my trip. However, there are many forms of networking.

Soccer: Two games this week and after a week of fried food and drinking, I definitely need the exercise. I thought 2 weeks ago would be my last game, but it seems I've squeezed in a few more and this will definitely be it. It makes me a bit sad as soccer is definitely a part of me I don't want to lose over the next two years. Pick up games will definitely be planned at the beginning of the school year.

Pending Trips: San Diego is in the works for this weekend, though I need to connect with a friend to determine logistics. Funny enough, I've never been to SD and have spent the majority of my life in SF.

Class of 2011: I'm so happy to see so many active members of the next class. Sometimes I read my posts from the beginning and it makes me realize how far I've come. I hope you feel the same.

Blog: I finally added an email address to the About Me section of the this blog. It occurred to me that I don't make it easy for people to message me and occasionally, people do have questions.

Mid-day Funeral

If I were to say it hasn't been a roller coaster day, I would definitely be lying. Though I had the day off on Monday, it was confirmed, I lost the battle against the cold I had been fighting all weekend. Tuesday was like any other Tuesday that feels like Monday - work, home, meeting, and home again. Even if I tried, I wouldn't have made it to bed by 10 pm as I arrived home only moments before that hour. Given my health status, I still proceeded to attend work at 7 am this morning, which had me a bit perplexed as I read earnings reports from two of my holdings which gave me the most substantial profits of last year. There they go. I still wonder if I should sell, but remind myself that I am a longterm investor.

I was supposed to leave at 8 am sharp, but walked out the door at 20 past, starved. Things were apparently hectic at home because everyone was supposed to be ready for our 8:30 am departure. Luckily, I live close to work so my delay did not delay the family. I walked in the door of the house to walk right back out. And we were off... to the funeral.

I thought I could hold it together this time seeing the last time I had visited this specific church was 6 years for another funeral, my grandmother's. I said my hellos to each family member, signed the book, and quickly turned my head away from the pictures scattered on the front table. I knew I would lose it if I gazed at them any longer. Yes, today my grandfather is in a better place, I know that. I just hope he and my grandmother have reunited as she was his sole true love, even after 55 years they parted too soon.

The day was more emotional than I anticipated, which is probably a combination of the sadness of the day and my unstable health. BLAH! I think my father did better during this ceremony than the last one we all attended. Everyone always says to remember their life and I do. My grandfather lived a full one, WW II vet, financial advisor, father of 4 children, happy, giving, and overall a complete gentleman. I am blessed to have known him. And blessed to have caring people in my life. But it doesn't mean I omit tears from today.

...Not much else on other fronts. I hadn't seen a lot of my family in quite a long time, so it was good to share stories with them, but I'm at a loss when it comes to the b-school front. I should hear back in the next two weeks, however I hate explaining with such uncertainty that I intend on going to b-school, and don't know if it will be this year. I have my semi annual review tomorrow and was talking with my mom's friend, I need to tell my bosses that whether or not I go to b-school this year, I will be leaving soon. I can't take another year of my job. Although it's been good experience and I adore my bosses, it's time to find something new, find my passion. The friend suggested I work on campaign of someone she knows. It's something to consider.

Last thought, I need to come up with an outfit for MASTER OF THE FUNK. R.O.C.K. is an organization in San Francisco that helps inner-city kids. I am going to be a member of their host committee for their Third Annual Funk Out with R.O.C.K. in April. We are creating a You Tube type promotional video titled “Who will be crowned the Master of the Funk”. The video will feature about 5 seconds of each of us dressed in our funkiest attire and giving our best pose, dance, strut, Blue Steel look or whatever. So any ideas would be appreciated. :)

And the Stress Mounts

Warning: A Bit Scatterbrained

Another day and another moment to worry about what if... What do I do if I don't get in? I'm ready to move away from my job, but if I don't get in and I choose to start this process again come fall, there's no reason to find a new job for 9 mos. Right? Granted, I could attempt to get this consulting career off the ground and start today, but then, do I postpone business school for another year. Indeed it may make sense, but I'll admit, I'm female and worry about, if I don't do it now, will I never do it? Questions, n-o answers.

At this point in the process, I don't exactly enjoy talking about business school anymore. I don't know if I'm definitely attending this Fall and I don't want too many people involved if it doesn't work out as planned. My mom's friend and I were talking at dinner tonight and she mentioned that I should ask for feedback from the schools to which I don't get accepted. Any thoughts? For a school like Kellogg, I can tell in some ways why I didn't get in, so is it worth the energy, on top of which, would they take the time to respond? I thought I heard once, that they USED to give feedback, but have since changed their policy. Indeed, this could simply be telephoned hearsay.

Unfortunately, about 20 minutes ago, I found out that my Grandfather passed. I'm not quite sure how to process this information yet. I know that sounds strange to most, but I believe my grandfather died when my grandmother passed over 4 years ago. They were married for over 50 years and she was his sole true love. He has been on the verge for years now. Modern medicine may be wonderful, but perhaps it's only for the living. What I mean is, he has been brought back, twice. The last time was a year ago and it's probably been that long since I have seen him. Although, I don't want to remember him as I do the last time I saw him. He asked the same question multiple times and every time we responded, it was as if our words didn't register. Sometimes, I wish I had been closer with him. He was in WWII as well as an investment professional, but I don't remember stories from either of those days.

R.I.P. Grandpa (no condolences needed...just take a moment to tell the ones around you that you love them)

I am very lucky to have the people that are in my life. I <3 You!

Downloaded a new song: Andain - Beautiful Things (Gabriel and Dresden Remix)

RTW

My brilliant plan is conditional on one thing, getting into business school. This is not another post about how I seem to freak out about my future. Instead, I am talking about my glorious future and my plan. For months, I have discussed traveling Europe before I step foot on campus, but today, I actually thought about the possibilities. Ever heard of a Round the World ticket aka RTW? There's a great post on WikiTravel describing the logistics in detail. I took some time on the Star Alliance website to design a trip leaving San Francisco that would take me to 12 destinations, 3 continents, and a final hurrah in Las Vegas for my 26th birthday. I would cover 29000 miles in a little less than 2 months. Obviously I'd put more thought into where I want to go and what I want to see before purchasing a ticket, but what an opportunity. As I'm constantly reminded, I have the means, it's a chance in a lifetime. Of course, I'm still skeptical about wearing the same clothes for 2 months.

Who is JulyDream?

Perhaps this should have been my first blog post and over the past year, I've started this post multiple times, but I can never get it right. It's hard to convey who is JulyDream in one simple post. Nonetheless, figure out what it is I want to say about her, and in essence, me. JulyDream was my first online alias; started as a screenname that I created back when 56K was all the hype. Even though, the connection speed never seemed to venture over 28K. When I created JulyDream, I was roughly 11. In the midst of my middle school years, I never knew this alias would follow me as it has.

The Breakdown: I started with July because it is my birth month and for some reason a mild obsession of mine, much like birthdays in general. The latter part of the alias was construed from my love of dreams and everything that comes with them. I lived under a sea of stars that made my room glow bright for about 5 minutes solid before dimming to dreamland.

It all seemed logical at 11, and now, almost 15 years later, JulyDream still exists. I'll admit that I wait for the ridicule or the popped eyebrow when I tell someone my email address. Luckily, AIM names are meant to be ancient, so people just expect a name predating high school. Although I have tried many times to get a "grown up" email address, it never works. I have a short first name and nine letters in the last name is rather difficult. Additionally, I want something that I can tell someone with minimal spelling required. This is JulyDream.

So, who is she? She grew up a native of the Bay Area peninsula. After an uneventful high school experience saturated with athletics, she chose CU - Boulder over Arizona and San Diego. Her first semester she joined the CU Club Soccer team and can count on less than 2 hands how many times she went out drinking. Maybe it was a sense of responsibility, or perhaps it was simply that she enjoyed herself with and without the intoxication.

As the years passed in Colorado, she forged lifelong friendships, with which she continually keeps in contact. For the first 2 years post graduation, bimonthly trips were made to Colorado. Over the last year, those have dwindled, substantially. After an exciting homecoming weekend in October, she was quickly reminded why she viewed her Colorado experience as a perfect 4.

Post college, she moved home. Not just home in terms of the Bay Area though, but literally, home, the house in which she spent 7 of her growing years. If you've ever met her parents or even her grandmother and uncle, you'd understand what she means by, "her parents party more than she does." Her brother swears that if she leaves, he's moving out too. Hopefully, that plan isn't too far on the horizon.

Today her life revolves around work, soccer, and business school applications/essays. After completion of the GMAT two days before her 25th birthday, she researched schools. Her options narrowed to five schools - Kellogg, Ross, Darden, Georgetown, & London Business School. Her future plan is fairly specific, although completely conditional on business school acceptance.

More details:
Ice cream addict. Footy (soccer) player. Enjoys laughter. Pool enthusiast. Weak ankles. Independent. Caring. Honest. Flawed. Positive. Reliable friend. Traveler. Dancing queen. Organizer. Purist. Night-owl. Musically obsessed. Poet. Scarred. Tomboy. Baker. Patient. Outgoing. Sensitive. Loyal. Social. Sleep deprived. Pancake fanatic. Vivacious. Cuddler. Movie buff. Runner. Photographer.

I am JulyDream.

Settling

Every time life seems to calm down, I realize that it is picking right back up. I took last weekend off from writing essays and I intended to start them, Monday, maybe Tuesday. Needless to say, it is Wednesday and I see no beginning in sight - tomorrow if I'm lucky.

As for my car, it's official, I'm dropping it off at the dealership today and odds are, I will never drive it again. Wow, that's a scary thought. Honestly, I'm not quite sure how I feel about the situation. On one hand, if I wanted my car, I'd keep it. No questions asked. On the other, the thrill of something new does excite me as well as better technology AND bluetooth capability. But, my car and I have had a functional relationship thus far, and sometimes I feel I'm cutting it short. The decision seems rushed, although I don't have a choice in the matter. It doesn't make any sense to extend my lease and makes even less sense to start a new lease. At that point, I might as well lease a new car. The economics of it all seems hard to comprehend when you think grad school could be 2 new cars, paid-in-full. Wow.

Back to business school applications - they're coming. I received my interview assignment from Kellogg earlier this week. I emailed the interviewer, but have yet to hear back from him. Presumably, I will call him this afternoon, but I don't want to seem like a pest. It's a thin line to walk when this individual determines a good portion of your future as a candidate for the school. My heart pitter-patters just thinking about it.

Spinsters is going well and I've realized that being on the hostess committee, you meet a lot of new people, who of course, I can't remember their names, but additionally, you don't have all the time to socialize. I feel like I missed a good portion of socializing with everyone yesterday. It isn't a huge deal, but due to my other current commitments, it's hard to connect with people.

After my meeting, I spent a few hours catching up with L1 and helping her with her finance homework. I seriously felt the case was more accounting than finance, however, that didn't change the numbers we were searching for. Unfortunately, I don't remember all the little things, like how to calculate depreciation expense for tax and book purposes. There's straight line and double declining balance, but the case did not specify which to use. Typically, you want to decrease your tax value more than your book value, but we used straight line for both. There were numbers that I didn't quite understand, so I did my best, however, I think I would have been more help if I was actually taking the class. This is what I have to look forward.

Guess it's time to stop emptying the head and start working on "work". That's an additional topic that I likely should not get into.

Sunrise...to Sunset

Three years ago, I started working in a small company. The hours were set: 7 am to 3 pm. At first, I thought I was crazy seeing I rarely woke before 7 am on any given day. I've learned to love the house and it's not very often that I stay past 3 pm. Occasionally I take off early on Fridays for the airport or just because. At the same time, I know what my duty is and when something MUST be done, I do put in the extra effort to get it completed. Yesterday was one of those days. I arrived at the office at 7 am, pitch black outside because of the change in daylight savings. We purchased two new computers and they had to be set up, so the tech guy came in around 1 pm. We worked through until 4:30 pm at which point he took off to his next job and I at to install the docks. Needless to say, I walked out of work at 6:30 pm, the sun was over the hill and the pretty colors in the sky had subsided. Granted, there was enough light to see my car, but not one of my favorite moments.

Darden - Complete

Another one done, which means I have finished more applications than I have left to complete. WOW! What a relief. Perhaps now, I will actually have time to contemplate my car dilemma. Both my parents vote for a new car, however, they aren't paying for it. Fact is, I love my car, but as noted, this may be the last chance for me to get a new car for a while. Point taken.

This weekend, I'm go to take a full break and stay off the computer. My right shoulder is killing me. I also plan on getting back into the gym, maybe tonight seeing I have time to spare. :D You have no idea how happy I am! Although I am on cloud nine, the thought of essays lingers in the back of my mind. I do however, remind myself that I have three weeks to complete the next set...walk in the park compared to the last few.

Darden's essays may have been different, but in the end, I thoroughly enjoyed writing them. They were thought provoking of another kind and if that is any indication of how Darden will be, I'd be happy to attend. :) For whatever reason, I am feeling fairly confident right now. It is a fantastic feeling and I just hope that means I end up with an interview. Ready to dance... or something. If only it was Friday.

PS If anyone is curious, my Kellogg application got sorted. It was a mistake on their behalf.

Every So Often

Every so often you have to be grateful for what you have. I received this message today and it brought a smile to my lips. Today, I am grateful for all the people in my life.

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's, arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry, as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound. While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease. As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked him, "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?" He smiled as he patted my hand and said, "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is." I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life."

True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make
the best of everything they have.

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

"I have wasted thousands and thousands of kisses on you- kisses that I thought were special because of your lips and your smile and all your color and life. But now I know you don't mean any of it. Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed so tight." - That Thing You Do

Sleep is GOOOD!

I crawled into bed shortly before 8 pm last night. I was down for the count by 30 after and today I feel good. I don't quite have that I've slept forever and feel good feeling, but getting out of bed this morning was more pleasant than it was been in days. :D

Yesterday, I test drove two cars. It's hard to compare when I basically believe I have the best. Besides my "finicky" CD player, my X5 has been very good to me. When I posted here - 3 years ago, that I was getting a new car, many lashed out about what a spoiled brat I am. It's true on some level. I am spoiled, but by no means do I consider myself a brat. Lucky would be my word choice.

Anyhow, the Tribeca was nice and hugged the road. I think it still has some kinks and if Subaru keeps at it, they'll get it. On the other hand the RDX is definitely for the tech savvy. I'm addicted to gizmos and gadgets, which could be the reason I was enthralled with this car. The bluetooth is definitely a nice feature because lately, I feel that I lose my headpiece, but the car also has voice activation for EVERYTHING! You can tell it to play a CD and track number. You can instruct it to find the nearest Mexican restaurant. It is even programmed with Zagat reviews. Talk about nifty. So the downside, it's missing one of my FAVORITE things, parking sensors. I don't understand what is going on with these cars. You can get back up sensors and they install a rear camera, but they don't allow for front sensors. I guess people don't realize how efficient they are for parallel parking, especially in San Francisco.

Now what? The Acura was a nice drive, although definitely not as smooth as my BMW. The sales guy said that Acura drivers like to feel the road. I think they just don't know what it is like to not feel the road. (Personal opinion of course.) There's nothing wrong with feeling the road. I drove a Discovery for 6 years, which definitely drives like a truck. But after three years in luxury, I'm not sure I want to return to that. I have a week to decide and finish 7 essays. OUCH.


"Before you speak, ask yourself, is it kind, is it necessary, is it true, does it improve on the silence."

You Have No Upcoming Events

A miraculous thing happened today or perhaps it's not miraculous and just a sign of life mellowing out. I logged on to evite today and was met by "You have no upcoming events". As a member of both Spinsters of San Francisco and the soccer community, my social calendar is never empty. If it's not a game or a meeting, it's a party or a fundraiser, but this week, it's empty, at least as far as evite is concerned.

My week is not as empty as it may seem, but after the events of the past few months, I'm looking forward to having a couple day breather. I still have practice on Wednesday, a Spinsters event on Thursday and a game on Sunday. All fun things, but without MBA information sessions as I've had the last few weeks, I may actually get a moment to start my grad school essays. Here's hoping.

Everyday is Learning

What I’ve found is I’m not perfect
I’m flawed in ways that I can’t quite explain
My advisors don’t always have the advice I need
And I spent too much time listening to them
Rather than myself

I cruised,
In everything I did
Be it work, play, friendship, relationship
I let it mold me
Instead of molding it
I don’t have regrets
Only natural mistakes

I’ve learned that I want to be better
Inside and out
I want to share time with those special in my life
I don’t need to know everyone
But those few close people dear to my heart
My effort should be with them
And for them

There’s a balance of selfish and selfless
It takes time and communication, to discover what is right
Sometimes you have to give everything
And sometimes nothing
It’s never even,
But it can’t be one sided

Love sneaks up on you
Whether you want to feel it or not
Be aware of it,
It’s an important and phenomenal feeling
It can also destroy every part of you
Tread softly

Dreams are what we make of them
Without the risk of failure,
A dream is nothing
But the risk,
Is what makes trying all the better
Taking a step out the door is vital,
But you must take more than one step to get to the road.

We change daily.
Your best friend today
May not be your best friend tomorrow
Cherish the moments you share today
Plan for tomorrow as if they’ll always be there,
But if they’re not,
Be strong enough to carry on

3900 Saturdays

The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:

I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whom-ever he was talking with something about "a thousand marbles." I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say "Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It's too bad you missed your daughter's "dance recital" he continued. "Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities." And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."

"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years. "Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I'm getting to the important part. It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail", he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays." "I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear."

"Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight."

"Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time."

"It was nice to meet you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 Year old Man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!"

You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.

Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast." "What brought this on?" she asked with a smile. "Oh, nothing special, it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles.

And so, as one smart bear once said..."If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you." - Winnie the Pooh.

Paris

Of course the plan was to stay off the internet for the duration of my trip, but computer in hand, and net available, it hasn't happened. I've managed to refrain from emailing hellos to everyone in the address book and shooting IMs to everyone on my buddy list. This is a trip to decompresss. So far, I have. I've slept more in the last few days then I have in weeks. In some ways, its a blessing, but in others, I feel I've missed something. I'm not sure what that is exactly, but I'm itching to go out, put on my dancing shoes, and explore all that is Paris.

My mother and grandmother would be perfectly content talking the night away with a glass of wine in each hand. I don't blame them, but I long for something more. I guess I'm looking for more in the world. I'm not quite sure what that is, but more. I'm looking for more in life.

I'm handing the net over to mom... off to the clubs.

Another Whirlwind

Or perhaps it's better put as a hurricane weekend. I can't believe it's Monday! I'm not sure where the weekend went, but it was a good one. I'm blessed to have good friends that are very dear to my heart.

Lauren, Mike and I saw Bourne on Friday night. AWESOME movie!! It was the perfect relaxing Friday night.

Saturday, I was up at 7 am. I had to be on the field in Palo Alto at 8 am to check in before my 9 am game. I played in the Silicon Valley Soccer Tournament. It was a lot of fun. We didn't have enough women for a full team on the field, but won our first game playing with 9 players and our second, playing with 10. I even scored a goal in the second game. That doesn't happen too often. :) We lost our 3rd game in fine fashion because of shitty refs (that was sarcasm). It definitely sucked, but we knew we'd be facing them again in the championship. The only nice thing about losing the third game was our next game on Sunday morning was pushed to 10:15 am instead of 9 am.

Saturday afternoon I took a quick nap before getting ready to go out on the town with the girls. Jenna, Lauren and I went out to Blue Chalk in Palo Alto. I can't remember the last time I had been out in Palo Alto. In the past year, I've spent the majority of my time in San Francisco. It was a great time. Jenna's teammate Iver came down from SF - had a few drinks and a few dances. Tony stopped by as well. Shauna came by - a little drunk from the football game. Overall, it was a fun night!! I was exhausted by the end however.

My 3 am bedtime was met by another 9 am morning. Game at 10:15 am, which we won with flying colors. I had to miss the championship due to a previous engagement, but I'm happy to report that my team WON, so I get a t-shirt. I headed home for a quick shower and change - then I was off to the Spinsters' new member tea in San Francisco. The tea ended around 4 pm and I had to run back to the house for our 5 pm lobster party. The party was a hit! I had the privilege of inviting a few of my friends. It was the perfect group. Everyone played catch up and got along great. My father and I danced on the porch, then we headed to the patio to enjoy the music, lights and stars. The grounds are amazing!

My night concluded around 11 pm and I was definitely ready for some shut eye. It's Monday morning and I'm ready to go home already. I need to pack tonight for my adventure tomorrow - PARIS! I'm hoping to catch a few winks on the plane.

Letting Go

We all experience loss in various forms. Some people lose parents while they're young. Others feel loss in the form of a close pet. Friendships build and friendships break. We have romantic relationships that work and those that don't. With all forms of loss, we have to learn to let go. We have to learn that each experience happened for a reason and will hopefully teach us to be stronger in the end. It seems the healing process when we're young is quicker than that when we're old. I'm not sure if it's because there is more going on when we're young and we're more fixated on the hole when we're old. Perhaps we build closer relationships with people and things as we get older. Or it's just more understanding about what is going on. Either way, it doesn't make the difficulty vanish. You have to keep your head high and mourn for as long as you need, but know, one day, you must let go.

Footy and Football

I play football on a consistent basis, but it's only referred to as football for the rest of the world. Today started off great. Michelle crashed over here after a fun night out. We caught breakfast at Bay Watch in Millbrae. I must admit, I miss the days of Le Peep and Boulder. Lots of good memories after crazy drunk nights! :D

An old middle school friend set up a football game (American) for 11am sharp. It was touch, small field, 3v3 to begin. I would consider myself athletic, however, I don't think I've actually ever played football. My eye hand coordination sucks! Needless to say, 4 more people showed and we had a game of 5v5. It was a blast. 75 degrees and sunny, nice grass, no shoes, I miss these days! Although I did get laid out by the big guy twice. The first time, he ran into me when we were running our routes and the second, I put my body in front of him to block my QB. OUCH!

After football, Michelle and I returned home. She rinsed and we were off to footy. Unfortunately it was an entirely different weather pattern in SF. Footy didn't go quite as well as I would have liked and I feel like I've been through WWIII. I got a cleat to the thigh and caught a shot on my arm. Trust me, I didn't mean to do the latter. I now have a welt in the form of a hexagon on my arm. Sometimes I wonder how I'm still standing.

Footy was followed by Windy City deep dish pizza. Mmmm mmmmm gooood! And of course, you have to have Cold Stone for dessert. I <3 food!

Finally, I dropped Michelle off at the airport. Talk about a whirlwind vacation! It's been a great, but not so lazy Sunday. It's now time to shower and catch up on some phone calls before a beer with the crew coming in from St Thomas. TROUBLE.