I Keep Telling Myself

Last week concluded first year classes for me. Unfortunately, I still have a week of finals ahead. I took off on Thursday and drove to Louisville, KY where I met the family and kicked off Derby weekend. The Derby is an event like no other (more on that later). Subsequently, I failed to do ANYTHING productive this weekend.

I've returned to ELA hell (which is a LARGE group project due on Friday) and have still managed to be unproductive though I know how important being a group member is. I keep telling myself to power through and not to drop the ball now, but find that is much harder than I'd like to admit. I suppose it's because as much as I understand now what the end goal of all our muddling was, I'm extremely irritated by the fact that I don't have any of the right answers to my questions. We've already interviewed people with questions that I now deem unworthy. Unfortunately, I'm not sure if we can go back to the company because of the massive hoops we had to jump through in the beginning. FRUSTRATING!!! I am NOT a lazy person or group member, yet my worth is dwindling. ONE MORE WEEK! I can't wait for a break from school.

Note: ELA = Enterprise Leadership Audit. It is a new project in one of our first year core courses where we work with a company to figure out where they invest in their people/processes that helps support their strategy. The ideal company for this project is around 50 members, local and you know someone of power in it to collect the information you need. Unfortunately, that is not our company.

Rant: TNDC

I write today with a heavy head. I try to separate emotion from fact and take a deep breath as I contemplate the base of my opinion. If this post is vague, I apologize. I’m not trying to flush out all the details of this week’s happenings, but give a gist of what I understand happened and how I feel about it.

TNDC is an institution at Darden and this year, we have had a number of disagreements regarding the boundaries of school-wide TNDC emails. Opinions flew early year, which resulted in the discontinuation of emails until recently, though not a discontinuation of TNDC. We had a Poobah (which is what we call the TNDC organizer) turnover and since have had 3 TNDC’s. The emails are meant to be comical and often make fun of classmates. I’d like to think that the majority of those targeted classmates take no offense to these emails. And if they do, that they would speak directly to the Grand Poobah. However, I suppose with some of the crude sense of humor embedded in these emails (of which, I personally, am a fan), you’re bound to insult someone in the community of 600+. I get that and understand that!

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Here are Darden, the foundation of the case method is part fact, part opinion. We’re learning in ethics, that there is no absolute right or absolute wrong in many instances. There’s a lot of gray matter, but analyzing different aspects of a situation from standards to consequences, and values to character will allow better decisions. So perhaps the consequences of publishing some off-color commentary was not as thought out as it should have been. That said, I believe there is no reason to ruin the potential livelihood of the publishing party because you believe they crossed your boundary of what is PC. If you have a problem, act as an adult. Everyone took Management Communications and Leading Organizations – which is where we emphasize difficult conversations and how to handle them. So test those skills and hold a difficult conversation. The United States has become so PC that we forget that we are allowed and encouraged to have different opinions. This, in my mind, is what furthers thought, ideas and creativity.

I also have two other problems with actions in response to the differing of opinions regarding boundaries – the first is being offended on behalf of someone else. First, the targeted person needs to be offended for this to matter, in my opinion. If that person acknowledges that they don’t care, leave it alone! My next problem is the 10 year old “mommy” scenario. This I equate to playing kickball with a group of kids, the child who owns the ball starts losing, so he decides to take his ball home, stopping the game, and go tell mommy, who proceeds to scold the rest of the group. I’m sorry, but we’ve all been through college and have “grown up”. Mommy, the faculty, the dean or your boss won’t always be there to “fix” your disagreements. A simply conversation could have easily resulted in an understanding between the parties. WE ARE THE FUTURE LEADERS OF AMERICA! Let’s act like them.

My disclosure is that these are purely my opinions. I believe that no organization is perfect and though I love Darden, sometimes these imperfections draw out opinions and thoughts in us all. I wanted to share mine.

The Reading

They say that SY is MUCH easier than FY. They also say that Q4 is a taste of SY... I'm hoping they're wrong. I just can't handle the enormous amount of reading every night! I actually decided NOT to read my LO case for Tuesday (I think this is the 3rd time since the beginning of school that this has happened). Luckily it was on Nordstrom, a store with which I am quite familiar. I was amused to find that my neighbor in class has never been to a Nordstrom and wanted to know to which store she should compare it. I suppose I forget that east and west can be VERY different.

Grades were also posted today. I think the forced curve has people scrambling to inch themselves up to the next level. I do agree that a B+ in participation & and B+ on an exam should not equal a B, but they do occasionally. I'm "competent" in Strategy, which means I've landed among the other 60% or so of my class that received Bs. Honestly, I'm happy about that. I managed to hold strong in the quant classes and I'm not sure where I went wrong in Management Communications. I find it ironic that grades are posted but we are still 3 exams short in you mailboxes (graded exams are distributed to our mailboxes for student pick-up). I'm not sure if that comes down to an assistant problem or a time problem. Heck, I'd be happy to help with distribution, though I'm sure there's some rule forbidding it.

Today is going to be busy! I'm calling Round 2 admits starting around 6:30p and then I have bowling. All this plus 2 cases tomorrow. I haven't looked at Financial Reporting, but Ethics is supposedly about 30+ pages. OUCH!! Off to discuss the future of oil prices in Global Financial Markets. We have a guest teacher today who will be running the class. What do you think, up, flat or down?

Rankings

Is it just me or do you ever get sick of the rankings? The schools to which I applied were chosen based on more than what some magazine, website or book said. I did attend an HBS information session and I wasn't impressed. At an MBA tour, I walked into a UCLA and USC chat, I left the UCLA chat halfway through. It wasn't for me. Duke was also on my radar, but in the end, didn't give me butterflies. There are a handful of programs I didn't even bother in investigate - Stern, Tepper, Notre Dame, Yale, Chicago etc... It doesn't make them bad programs, I just made a choice early on and decided they weren't for me. I don't believe that is good or bad, it just is.

What is the "best" school for one person may not be for the next. Yes, they talk about fit and as we write our thoughts into 500 word essays we chuckle to ourselves, what the heck is fit? But in the end, I believe there's more merit to the concept than many of us give credit. It's important to feel comfortable in all aspects of the school, so that you never look back with, I should have.

Because of the rankings, I do believe schools build reputations and I do believe doors are opened, however, I want to be able to open some of my own doors. Yes, an MBA from the top 5 will lift eyebrows from anyone in or out of the MBA business. That's nice, but I would hope that I'm also chosen for a position based on my own aptitude. It sounds a bit silly huh? It's like those girls obsessed with Gucci, Prada, Dolce and Gabbana etc... at the end of the day, it's just a brand. None of schools that sit in ranks 10-20 or even 20-30 think themselves as a second tier school and I'm sure none of the attendees think that way either.

I guess what I'm saying is sometimes I think we're too focused on the numbers - rankings, GMAT score, age, years of work experience etc. There are a handful of candidates that attend business school immediately after college and another handful that wait until they are 50. There are so many other factors that make more sense than who someone else thinks is the best.

Back Home with the Big Kids

Home sweet home! You have no idea how great it felt to sleep in my own bed and have my own space after living out of a suitcase for 4 days. However, when I return to work, I always wonder if the break is worth the mound of paperwork on my desk and list of tasks I have to redo because someone didn't take the time to do them right. ARGH!

Anyhow...I know everyone is wondering... the interview. I'm happy I waited until today to write this post because I think I would have written a different story yesterday. The interview at Darden is indeed on one hand as lax as everyone says. It's a "conversation" in which the applicant does the majority of the talking and dictates the direction. You have one question to answer, tell me about yourself and what has driven you to make the decisions you have made. They want the WHY!

I started at the beginning which in retrospect may have been the right place, but seeing I didn't practice as I probably should have, I left out some important things about what I do and who I am today. There are things I mentioned, but I guess wanted to mention and move on, however, my interviewer was interested in why I did or did not do something, which all in all simply ate up time.

I took too long explaining how the company has changed and the small hand I have had in that instead of how I have changed processes and shaped a once undefined position in my company. Besides mentioning the name, I failed to mention anything else about my women's philanthropic group and how I essentially coordinate 60+ volunteers. Just silly on my part. She had trouble wrapping her head around the WHY MBA question. She suggested I go into operations somewhere else, which of course, I don't exactly want to do for the rest of my life - 4 years is enough. On one hand maybe she was challenging me as Darden is completely case based, of course on the other, perhaps she just didn't get it. Honestly it's hard to say.

I mentioned something about wanting a consulting job with an international twist. She asked why and I brought up globalization and my thoughts on China, which apparently didn't suffice as she mentioned I could have read that in the journal. Needless to say, she pushed a bit more and I kept coming back with new thoughts and insights.

Finally, we talked about WHY DARDEN. This was probably the easiest question there is and I NAILED it. At the end she mentioned how some of my comments about Colorado and my undergrad reminded her of Virginia and the Darden community. Hopefully this is a good sign.

I walked out of the room and was grabbed to attend another faculty lunch. I was happy that this time I sat at a table with a finance professor, but my mind was running 10,000 miles a minute and I'll admit, I was fried. I forewent food and listened to the conversation before me. At the time, I had no clear thought process and was out of questions to ask as I had probably used my last on my interviewer. I've spoken with and met so many friendly people at Darden that I don't know what else to ask anymore.

The rest of my day was spent trying to get home. I didn't even look at my itinerary to see what time I was supposed to be home, but someone did mention we were two hours late. Oh well. Over the course of the day, I was in contact with some delightful people and some not so delightful. As I boarded my last flight in Zone 2, I noticed a guy inching to the front of the line and he was Zone 1, so I told him he could go ahead. I was being courteous and figured he was going to ask somewhere along the line anyhow, he looked at me, told me he didn't need my permission, he was in Zone 1. I HATE when people feel entitlement.

Now the hurry up and wait process begins... February 1st is D-Day.

Anonymous

As I cruised the blogosphere and posted my comments today, I noticed a few comments from "Anonymous". Anonymous posting is an interesting paradox in the blogosphere. On one hand, this person wants their thoughts to be read and interpreted, but not enough to claim them as their own. I suppose I could empathize with anonymous comments on a severely controversial blog which may cause problems in one's personal life, but given that many applicant blogs are simply about each of our experiences, both successes and woes, I guess I don't understand the true controversy that warrants an anonymous post. Or is it these commentators are simply too lazy to fill in their personal information? We don't ask for your social security number and birth date in order to steal your identity, but we do ask for a name. And as most people in the blogosphere use one, we'll settle for an alias.

Any thoughts?

Civic Duty

I'm sorry judge, my story may sound silly, but it's true, some guy did thrust his forehead into my finger. To say I'm not keen on my civic duty would be an understatement. It's not so much that I have better things to do as much as it is, I'm busy. Between Christmas, work, MBA applications, soccer, and sleep, I barely have enough time for me. And here some judge wants me to sit in a court room for the 4-5 days prior to Christmas to determine the fate of some woman I could care less about. To say that I can completely refrain from any preconceived notions, would be lying. To the best of my ability I will keep my personal reservations and morals to myself, but I often wonder why these "criminals" don't have any. Of course, perhaps, I'm passing judgment too soon...

Back from the court house, we walked in, sat down, and the judge proceeded. He indicated that he "accidentally" omitted some very important information, he has to be in Sacramento tomorrow, which means the case cannot be completed by Christmas. Although quite content with the decision to free us of our duty, I was a bit irritated that I sat in traffic for 30 minutes in the pouring rain for nothing. So instead of returning to work, I went to my mom's party. What a nice Tuesday afternoon.

BTW - Congrats to all those who have received acceptances to Chicago!! As they say, you only need one. :)

Rant: Entitlement

I am like most people. I get along with a vast majority of people. But there is one type of person that gets under my skin, those that feel entitlement. Why do people feel they have the right to always be included? Fact is, life is seldom fair. You won't always be on the invite list and perhaps it has nothing to do with you. Maybe someone could only invite a select few, maybe they thought you'd be uncomfortable, it could be you don't mesh well with the common group or perhaps it just slipped their mind.

What do these people do that they think they should receive the "benefit" of an invitation? Nowhere does it state that it is required. And more often than not, these people use the tactics of manipulation to con their way into an invitation. Why should you feel bad for not inviting someone to say a ball game? A night out on the town? Dinner? A trip? Yes, I'm sure people would love to go, but simply put, not everyone may be invited. If I invited everyone I knew to a bar on Friday night, then there wouldn't be anyone I didn't know. Isn't that half the fun of going out and living? Meeting new people? Sharing experiences?

I am a "more the merrier" type of person, but do not think that I don't get disgruntled by people inviting themselves. Most the time, I will tell you to come along or meet me there, no big deal. But sometimes, it's nice to have some one on one time. Sometimes it's nice not to have to juggle multiple conversations. Those that feel entitlement always seem to take things personally as well. Invitations or lack there of aren't about taking things personally. It's about the event, the company or some variation of both. If you harp on me and make it personal, I will most likely consciously not invite you the next time.

The Concept of the Toilet Seat

Through the years, we have taught men how to lift up and replace the toilet seat at home. It is only polite. But somehow, we seemed to have missed the concept all together. The point to this is so that the toilet seat is clean for the next person that uses it. I live in the glorious state of California where it is required for all public restrooms to have toilet seat covers. I don't really care if you use them or not, that is your prerogative. But please don't ruin it for the rest of us. SIT DOWN! Don't hover, squat or whatever it is you do, it causes a mess. Use the toilet seat cover or put toilet paper down. It is DISGUSTING to walk into a stall that is dirtied from the last person that was in there. Do you do that at home? If you're going to hover, lift up the toilet seat like the guys do, so the rest of us don't have to deal with it. We have taught men how to use the toilet seat, let's now teach women how to use the toilet seat cover. It isn't as complicated as it looks.