Thursday, July 26, 2007

Smile

Smile, in confuses people.

"There is a smile of love,
And there is a smile of deceit,
And there is a smile of smiles
In which these two smiles meet." -
-- William Blake

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

The absence of alternatives clears the mind marvelously. - Henry Kissinger

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Wiki

It's got an odd name, but Wikipedia has become the new encyclopedia. Oddly enough when you search google, you are more likely to bring up the Wikipedia article than an encyclopedia article of any kind. The Harvard Business School had an interesting post on why and how Wikipedia works.

It is definitely ironic how we move forward assuming that the information on Wikipedia is true. In most cases, Wikipedia works, but obviously shown by this article, there are errors in the published posts, however not many more than you'd find in an encyclopedia. Does this make one facet of information more truthful than the next? I know for a fact that I've looked up information on Wikipedia, but I never check another website for the validity.

On the other hand, Wikis have expanded past just informational encyclopedic sources. In another blog on Slate, this post demonstrates some of the shortcomings of Wikis. There again WikiTravel is very new and perhaps in 10 years, it'll be better than your average Lonely Planet.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Overreacting

Do you ever feel like people overreact? Something that seems small is blown out of proportion. Of course, it's hard to tell if it's the icing on the cake or if for some reason that person is particularly sensitive. Dinner tonight definitely changed my mood from relaxed to a bit bitter. Dad got mad because I grabbed silverware for myself and not the rest of the table. I didn't have hands, so I had put my silverware on my plate. I didn't think he wanted his dirty. This was immediately after he grabbed a milk glass for only himself. I hate double standards.

Monday, July 23, 2007

Monday Monday

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
-Mark Twain

"To get to rainbows, you have to go through the storms." - Gabe Helgerson

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Footy and Football

I play football on a consistent basis, but it's only referred to as football for the rest of the world. Today started off great. Michelle crashed over here after a fun night out. We caught breakfast at Bay Watch in Millbrae. I must admit, I miss the days of Le Peep and Boulder. Lots of good memories after crazy drunk nights! :D

An old middle school friend set up a football game (American) for 11am sharp. It was touch, small field, 3v3 to begin. I would consider myself athletic, however, I don't think I've actually ever played football. My eye hand coordination sucks! Needless to say, 4 more people showed and we had a game of 5v5. It was a blast. 75 degrees and sunny, nice grass, no shoes, I miss these days! Although I did get laid out by the big guy twice. The first time, he ran into me when we were running our routes and the second, I put my body in front of him to block my QB. OUCH!

After football, Michelle and I returned home. She rinsed and we were off to footy. Unfortunately it was an entirely different weather pattern in SF. Footy didn't go quite as well as I would have liked and I feel like I've been through WWIII. I got a cleat to the thigh and caught a shot on my arm. Trust me, I didn't mean to do the latter. I now have a welt in the form of a hexagon on my arm. Sometimes I wonder how I'm still standing.

Footy was followed by Windy City deep dish pizza. Mmmm mmmmm gooood! And of course, you have to have Cold Stone for dessert. I <3 food!

Finally, I dropped Michelle off at the airport. Talk about a whirlwind vacation! It's been a great, but not so lazy Sunday. It's now time to shower and catch up on some phone calls before a beer with the crew coming in from St Thomas. TROUBLE.

Surprise!

It's Sunday and I'll admit, I'm tired. The weekend was definitely a winner. I hung out low key on Friday night. I'll admit I didn't know what to do with myself on Saturday considering I had no books to read and nothing to study. I tried to clean up a bit, but ended up spending my day importing music. Crystal had told me I had to be ready at 8:15 pm to go out. I couldn't figure out where we were going that early especially seeing it didn't include dinner, but I wasn't about to argue.

Drea picked me up at 8:30 pm. We went to Crystal's and I'll admit, I knew something was a bit fishy when we needed to park. We never park at Crystal's. Anyhow, I walked in to some great friends surprising me for a fun night out. (Thanks Crystal, Andrea, Jay, Mark, Lamar, Jimmy, Jordan, Mike and Pasha!) I was told there were 2 more surprises! And then they forced alcohol on me... (ok, maybe I willingly drank it)

I had told everyone months ago that we weren't celebrating my birthday. Turns out no one listened. I told them we could celebrate my GMAT score. :D

After a bunch of phone calls back and forth, my next surprise walked in. My friend Michelle flew out for the night from Colorado. She walked in and I didn't know what to say. I was about to ask "what are you doing here?", but I stopped myself. That was simply a very silly question. In the beginning I was definitely very quiet. I didn't know how to react to everything. I'm not normally the follower.

The third surprise was a navigator stretch limo! Unfortunately the limo didn't get any radio stations, so we spent half our trip to SF trying to find music. The other half was drinking champagne and making toasts.

We stopped by Rouge for a cocktail, which is where Ahna met us. After that, we traversed the city to Roe. We manged to get a CD from the driver so that we weren't listening to static. Unfortunately it had to be a sex remix of sorts. All songs, but the last two were definitely to set the mood. After 10 minutes at Roe, we decided that Roe wasn't going to happen. Both the VIP line as well as the pay line were around the block. We diligently tried to get someone to give us a burned CD, but to no avail.

Medjool in the Mission was our last stop. I had been there once, but spent the majority of my time on the rooftop deck. I was sad to find that they actually played good dance music in the main room, so this time around, I was all about the dance floor. Our journey to Medjool was just as entertaining as all the others. I was very close to getting us a CD, but the light turned green and the guy was turning, bummer!

Overall, it was a great night and I have great friends!!!

Friday, July 20, 2007

Sing Shot

It's been a day of browsing numerous articles on the web. Some ignite opinions, others simply amuse me. Here's one of favs today: Sing Shot - Karaoke on the Web. I guess it was only a matter of time until someone came up with this. You can get everything else on the web, might as well be able to karaoke without leaving the house.

On another note... ever wanted to channel surf the web? Here you go: Stumble Upon.

Think Different

I would call it one of the most anticipated launches in recent history, the iPhone had high expectations of being revolutionary. The success of the iPod is a hard act
to follow, but thus far, the iPhone is positioned as the "hippest consumer electronic device in years", probably since the iPod. Bruce Weinstein of BusinessWeek would have you believe that a lot is wrong with the iPhone and its effect on how people interact today. In this article, he shows how the iPhone leads to what he calls iSolation.

Personally, I'm torn by the article. In many ways, I feel that we live in a world obsessed with instant gratification. We're connected to everyone we know and everything we do by technology. In some ways we neglect our current surroundings, for instance, mothers use technology as a babysitter. Place the kid in front of the TV or a computer game and they'll be amused for hours. Another problem is the parent that is on their cellphone and has their kid in tow. Growing up, my mother took every opportunity she could to "lock" us in the car and talk to us. The music was turned down and that was conversation time. Moreover, as kids we same "We-Songs". I'm not sure that mentality still exists.

Bruce points out that this connection impairs our ability to function as a community, but I'd argue that it has simply changed the community we live in. We have become a world of networking sites: Myspace, Facebook, LinkedIn. The world as we know it has changed. Social interaction has changed. I would advocate that I'm better friends with those that partake in networking sites than I am with those that do not partake. Of course, I can't distinguish how much of the connection is because of working personalities. For instance, I try to stay in connection and so do they. Some people just don't have the desire.

Individual interaction is not what it used to be. Instead of holding one conversation, we've learned to multi-task and hold 3. The definition of community and the lines of a community have blurred. We may miss out on neighborhood barbeques, but I don't believe we miss out on community. We just live in different communities than our folks did. We are more connected today than ever before, which does have its pros and cons, but either way I don't think it's the fault of the iPhone. It's a result of the world we live in and the way we accept technology.

Bruce continues to note psychological health as a downfall of the iPhone. He believes that because we're constantly connected, we don't have time to daydream and be creative. But if you take this blog as a primary example, I am being creative. I write anything from random thoughts to poetry to opinions. It is this form of media that gives me the opportunity to openly express myself. Even he is circulating via the exact media that he condemns. We may be stimulated, but everyone knows when it's time for some personal downtime.

He specifies that the final cost of technology is the possibility of mortality and injury. Between people driving while talking on their cell phones and people listening to music while they cross the street, he is of the opinion that we are in greater danger in our everyday lives. On some level, this may be true. I researched and made a speech in college advocating the ban of cell phones while driving. It's true, some people can't multi-task. It's hard to advocate the use of cell phones when the evidence shows that they do influence actions, however there are those that act responsibly and take precautions. Furthermore, it would be hard to break people of the habit and luxury they've become accustomed. Stricter rules on hands free devices, in my opinion, is the best way to make the roads safer. In reference to banning electronics while crossing the street, I think that idea is preposterous. I don't want to say those not paying attention deserve to be harmed, but if you are crossing the street, you should be aware of your surroundings. This was the first lesson learned as a kid.

The call to action is to "Think Different", ironic as that is the Apple motto. Bruce does not blame corporate America for the resulting problems of the iPhone, the fault lies on individuals. What I think he fails to realize is that these "problems" are actually an effect of technology and the way it's consumed our lives. Granted a the root of the evil is the individual person, but we are raising a generation of kids that do not understand what it means to be without. Even I, at 25, don't remember life without TV. It's hard to envision 56K internet and I grew up with it. Bruce may advocate that the world should Think Different, but we already are. We're thinking different than what used to be.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

So by the way, I'm leaving and I need your help...

My work email this morning included an email mentioning my semi annual review. I find myself going into the review in a bit of a predicament. My bosses and I have discussed the possibility of Grad school before, but for me, it was always something on the horizon. I kept putting off the GMAT, which is probably one of the most important steps, so there was nothing to think about in the long haul. Now, I'm two days post GMAT and I've switched from researching local part time programs to brand name full time programs. It's amazing what a score does.

I haven't narrowed down any choices yet. I'm looking at the big picture for the moment, but I do know I'm going to need some letters of recommendation. I would say that my bosses "love me". I've become an integral part of the organization and the best way to describe what I do is that I keep the firm running. In a small organization, such as this, you wear many hats. My job isn't easily defined and I'm often doing ad hoc tasks.

I'm starting to wonder what I tell them in this upcoming meeting. I've always stressed being up front and honest with them. I doubt my job would be able to be done via telecommuting, but it is something I'd consider. I would never leave them high and dry, but I know it's time for me to do this for myself.

My older boss is well connected in the business world. He also attended Stanford for both his undergrad as well as his MBA. It'll be interesting to see if he can help me at all. If so, perhaps I could continue to work part time with a pay cut. I've also recently found out that a teammate of mine went to Northwestern. I feel she will be a great source of reference and advice. And finally another teammate of mine is attending Harvard next year. He has done lots of research and can hopefully steer me in the right direction for what I want to do. I'm very lucky to know so many highly educated people.

Now I just need to solidify what I tell work. I guess it's best to go with the truth. I'm not quite sure where I'm going, but I'm keeping my options open and I plan on starting school in Fall of 2008.

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Uno mas

"What lies before us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us." - Thoreau

The Birthday

I feel loved. I really do with all the calls, texts, and comments. It's nice to have so many people that care about you. However, it all seems to weigh on me. I want this day to be over and to move on. I have no plans with anyone except myself. That seems to be a trend over the years for my actual birthday (excluding the days that surround it). The tears well up as has been the case for the better part of the last decade. I can never seem to shake them. Sometimes this seems to be the loneliest day of the year.

It's hard to believe I've made it to 25. I was asked yesterday if I'd be interested in coaching an AYSO team of 7 year olds. Honestly, I have no idea what I'd teach them. I've learned that although I'm a decent player, my soccer coaching skills are limited. I need to take a little more time to think about it. It's still funny to be that I could actually coach 7 year olds.

The GMAT is done! I still can't believe I finished and with flying colors. WOW! It's surreal. I started requesting information from various schools yesterday. I also went to the bookstore and looked at a book consisting of the best 282 business schools. I returned home to purchase the book off Amazon. Although you neglect the instant gratification, it's much cheaper than buying it in the store. I have gone from a limited number of schools to a wide range. Now I have to answer the daunting questions and figure out where I'm going to apply.

My boss has given me permission to take off when the market closes at 1 pm. I'm super excited. The day has been moving slowly and I'm just not in the mood to be here. I have no idea what I'm going to do with myself, but I thought about walking along the shore. It's not sunny like it's been, but I am interested in listening to the waves crash. We'll see. Another option was to return a few things. I have jeans sitting on the floor of my room. There again, I'm not quite sure if I have the desire to go to the city. I should go to the gym and work out my ankles, yet, I'm just not feeling it. My mood seems to be dictating all my decisions. Maybe I'll just go home and take a nap. Of course that could postpone sleep tonight. Again, I just want this day to be over.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

On the Horizon

Life changed yesterday and I didn't realize it until I was talking about the future with a friend after dinner. The next step will be exciting. I feel like I've gotten the most important step out of the way - the GMAT. Now it's time to start researching schools and locations. I'm excited to embark on a new path, but I will admit, leaving this one is going to be sad. The magnitude of this is still hazy. I realize I'm being quite vague, yet I can't seem to articulate my thoughts. I'll try later.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Holy Sh*t!

I think I'm still in shock. Perhaps it's just delirium. Whatever it is, it feels good. The day started off fine as you can see from my last post. I had breakfast and worked out a few math problems. I wanted to get the juices flowing before the test. I had briefly googled the address so that I would have an idea where I was going, although I didn't bother to print directions because I have GPS. Needless to say, this was a BIG mistake. The testing center is on Filbert, but on the opposite side of Coit tower near Sansome. Needless to say, I ended up in the hills of North Beach, half lost and half freaking out. I had left with plenty of time to get to the testing center and planned on arriving 30 minutes prior to test time, thankfully. I called mom in a panic, but quickly hung up and called the testing center instead. The friendly voice on the other line was happy to help me. I finally made it with about 5 minutes to spare.

By this point, I was on the verge of breakdown. I had wanted everything this morning to go smoothly. I signed in, took a deep breath, and grabbed some water. This was it. The plan was to take this once and only once. I had a score goal, but I'll admit, it wasn't very high. So I went in and it began.

The test starts with back to back essay questions. There are two optional 10 minute breaks, one after the essays and one after the quantitative section. I took the first one after the essays. I grabbed water, borrowed the restroom and immediately returned to the testing both. There was no reason to dilly dally. At the end of the math, I wasn't sure how I did. Again, I took the break allotted and followed the same routine.

The math was over, it was time to focus on the verbal. It wasn't until the last 5 verbal questions that I started thinking about my score. At this point, I glanced at the time and realized that I needed to focus. The score in the past wasn't going to change.

I finished the test with about a minute left. I was definitely cutting it close, but I guess that's how you want a test like this to end. I wasn't rushed at the end, just chugging. After the test you have to decide whether you want to keep or dismiss your score. You don't get to preview it and if you dismiss it, it vanishes as if you never took the test. As I noted before, I wanted to take this once, so I opted to keep it. The score quickly flashes and my jaw dropped. I scored a 690. I thought it must be wrong, but then of course, it occurred to me that it wasn't. I wanted to scream, laugh, cry, and jump for joy. Pure shock.

I left my phone in the car and didn't have a signal in the garage. Of course the first person I called was my mom. I called a couple friends after that, but most of them did not answer their phones. I went straight to work and the day has been a haze ever since. My dad called me at work telling me how proud he was. It made me feel good. :) I did it. It's finally done. Time to celebrate.

On another note, this is a great quote I stole from a friend:

"Life is like Tango... sad, sensual, sexy, violent and quiet."

Test Day

Good morning! It's officially test day. I'm trying not to freak out and just relax. I'm not sure if it's working though. I went to bed early last night, but I was quite restless. I'm not sure if that's because of my injuries or I just couldn't sleep. Six didn't seem too early this morning, but perhaps that is because it's the time I typically get up on Monday morning. I'm actually going to do this. WOW! I don't think it's going to hit me until I sit down at the test site. Wish me luck! (Although it's probably too late for that now.)

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Wow!

First off, what a weekend. The Santa Cruz tournament was definitely a great time. Even though I probably shouldn't have been playing, I played, and had a blast. The ankle held up well and I plan on doing some exercises for it tomorrow after my test. Unfortunately the U-dogs were quite tired and thus lost in the championship game. However, the game before, we won in style. With 5 minutes left, and a score of 6-2, we rallied and tied the game at 6s. The game was quickly followed by PKs. We started with 3 players from each side. Stu managed to get a hand, a leg, or some body part on all the shots, but some of them still manged to get in. Tied at the end of 3, we kept adding players to the rotation. At number 6, I was up first. I drilled it into the back of the net, the keeper didn't even move. I didn't realize so many people were watching, but was told that it was a nice shot. I'm sure with pressure mounting, the last girl from the other team placed the ball to tie it up. She was barely on frame, hit the post, and the ball popped out, giving us the win. I'm happy to say that Celtic didn't face the same circumstances and had a blowout in their championship game. I would have liked to win a t-shirt. ;) All in all there were about 4 teams consisting of various friends from the soccer world. I couldn't have asked for a better send off before my test.

That's the other thing I want to touch on, my test. I can't believe it's tomorrow. I'm not freaking out quite as I thought I would be, but I guess there's still time for that. I guess what's on my mind even more is the next step. I need to decide where in or out of the US that I want to go to school, but more importantly, I need to decide what it is that I want to do. Everyone keeps asking and unfortunately I don't have a solid answer to their question. I'm ready for something different and I've considered a couple different realms, but I haven't picked one yet. I realize that I need to figure that out soon, but for now, I'm hoping to focus on my test and my prize, a nice cold beer.

I haven't had a sip of alcohol in almost two months. It was a personal goal of mine and I've made it. I haven't been a hermit either. I've had more sober 5 am nights in the last month than I've had drunk ones in years. It's crazy and I have to thank my friends for being so understanding. I'm ready to let loose though!

Below are some of the fun pictures from Santa Cruz, you know I can't leave my camera at home! :)

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Research

Through my job, I have access to numerous research sites. I’m not an advocate of making sites identical; however, I do appreciate an easy user interface. My favorite site has to be Morgan Stanley. The UI is simple and easy to use. I manually have to look for anywhere from 20 to 50 tickers on each site I visit and not all sites cover all tickers. Granted that number of tickers is only a small piece of the global financial pie, but seeing as I am mainly concerned with company specific reports, it can get tedious. Also, imagine searching 10 different sites, each with a different UI. This thought begs the question, what makes a good research site?

For starters, a good research site depends on the design. Is the page visually pleasing and easy to navigate? Second, can you easily navigate to US Equity research? I think it’s great that companies provide research on international firms, but I’m not concerned with any of these firms on a daily basis. Next, how many tickers are presented per page? If I have to go through pages of stocks just to see what happened in the last 24 hours, I’m going to get irritated. Plus the lag time between loading pages adds up.

Next, search capability is very important. If I need information on ONE ticker, I want to type it in and have all the information provided on the front page. Moreover if I’m going to email the most recent report, its title should be legible. A title of “dv.search” doesn’t tell me anything about what I just sent. And it definitely doesn’t mean anything to the recipient. Better yet, let me add a “watch list” of securities and search by this list only. It will save me time and there will be less traffic on your website.

I know no one asked my opinion, but it amazes me how horrible some of these sites are. There is one site I visit that randomly decides not to load on a consistent basis. I would hate to admit the cost of this site. There are others that provide you with a view of 5 stocks. If you want to see more, you have to hit the “more” button. At this point, you get an additional 5 stocks. I’m not sure how many technical calls these companies receive, but if they improved their UI, the call volume would definitely decrease.

Reality

It hit me this morning. The alarm clock rang and I realized exactly how tired I was. Another late night met by an early morning. Once again, I fell asleep next to my books. "I can't believe it's Thursday", was my first thought as I pulled myself out of bed. My test is Monday. Where did the time go?

In some ways, I'm ready to finish. The next step in my life should prove to be quite exciting. In others, I'm not sure what to expect. Some of the questions come easily whereas others I get stuck. When asked what I want to do with an MBA, I'm often torn. In some ways, I'm just looking for a new direction and a little more education. At the same time, I'm not sure what my ultimate goal is. I hope to solidify that by the time I apply to schools.

Next up on the agenda is my birthday. As I've consistently said for the last 3 mos, I'm not celebrating it. Nothing has changed with that and due to various commitments, it seems like that is going to stand. In some ways it's a bit sad because I'm typically excited about birthdays, but I have other things that need to be taken care of more than a celebration. One of those is catching up on sleep.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Some days

We all have those days that you wonder why you rolled out of bed in the morning. It's sub 8 am and I am wondering just that. I played an ad-hoc make up game last night, and I'm almost wishing I would have said no. But I never like to let a team down. I managed to catch a shot on the inside of my left foot, thus thrusting my foot back and tweaking the inside of my left ankle. This is a common problem that I've been wrestling with for the last 3-7 years. The left ankle is a recent development in the last 3 years. The last 2 months have been great. I've been lifting, running, and getting back into shape. The problem is, whenever I slightly tweak an ankle, it sets me back, not days, but months. Needless to say, I rolled out of bed to the reality of pain. I know I won't be playing for a spell.

Getting dressed for work wasn't a big deal other than the fact that I'm a bit tired from two late nights. I walked into work and was met with slight disdain. Apparently a client was a bit irritated about the excess proceeds and tax consequences of a trade. It was simply assumed that I must not have put in the correct versus purchase date and thus, we need to instill a new process to "check" on me. I've been doing this job for almost 3 years. I realize that in the beginning this thought would be an easy explanation, but at this point, I feel I'm more on top of it. Sure enough, it was found that this had nothing to do with me and the facts presented seem all but correct. I wish people would think before they start a rampage at 7 am. It definitely would have helped out my morning.

Monday, July 09, 2007

Sleeping with my Books

I'm finally coming down the home stretch, 7 days. As I've noted before, I'm excited to get this over. I've been rocking the math with minimal mistakes, but the verbal still seems to give me problems. I am not nervous about the actual test as much as I am about taking it on a computer. I have found in my practice sessions that my eyes get weak after staring at the screen for 2 hours. I just need to focus. Take a 2 minute break in the middle and get back to it.

My books line the opposite side of my bed. I'm not trying to soak in the information through osmosis or anything, but it's a nice constant reminder of what I have to do. I was restless last night and I have a game tonight. I should be fine, but I hope not to feel tired at the end of the day when I'm supposed to be concentrating. I also play in a tournament this weekend. I haven't decided if that's good, but I think it will be nice to decompress. On top of which, I will hopefully be exhausted on Sunday and go to bed early. This way I'll be well rested by Monday morning. If my test score is consistent with my practice tests, I will be quite content. I will definitely be focusing on more problems over the week however.

Wish me luck!

Friday, July 06, 2007

Love

Franklin P. Jones
Love doesn't make the world go 'round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

Kristen Kappel
Love is when you look into someone's eyes, and see everything you need.

Lucy Van Pelt, in Peanuts, by Charles M. Schulz
All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt!

Dave Meurer
A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' come together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.

Madonna, O Magazine, January 2004
To be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return. To just give; that takes courage. Because we don't want to fall on our faces or leave ourselves open to hurt.

Henry Kissinger
Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.

Rita Rudner
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Sam Keen
You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.

Anonymous
Love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends.

Lust is Selfish

Lust is selfish. Love is selfless. Like doesn't have the endurance of love.

I'm not the norm. I admire good looking men but I don't lust after them (meaning I won't let them touch me). Lust doesn't kick in for me until after I'm really into a guy (I have a base form of love) and when it kicks in, it's in hyperdrive. I want him and only him. The guy could be in Siberia, God could drop LL Cool J in my lap and LL just won't cut it. My body, mind and heart are three precious things to me and I am picky on who I give it to because those are the biggest "gifts" I can give. Any sort of romantic entanglement with LL (even a kiss) is not worth potentially losing someone I love and loves me back.

That's how I know. I naturally become selfless, considering his feelings first and it doesn't go away when another handsome guy gives me attention. That doesn't mean it's reciprocated and I think that's where a lot of people get into trouble. They give their heart to someone who isn't giving their heart back. When someone is really into you, their actions will match their words.

Not just talking about romance/relationships, but I've always been able to tell who I loved in my life. They're the ones who can hurt me the most.

That's the tell-tale "oh uh" sign for me. When I find myself reacting to things I normally wouldn't care about. The flip when I know I've hurt him without meaning to and I just want to make things right.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Animator vs. Animation


Animator vs. Animation by *alanbecker on deviantART

Quotes

I love quotes. It does not matter if they are movie, famous, or random. Quotes give us good life advice, they make us laugh, they make us remember. I'm going to start adding quotes here. Sometimes I'll add one and other times, many. Please add anything you think I might like or feel free to comment on any of the individual quotes.

In life, it isn't what happens to you that is important, it is what you do with what happens to you that matters.

I live for the nights I won't remember with the friends I will never forget.

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL, LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC!

The best revenge is to live well. - Nate R.

"What a good friend! One who is willing to drive you to your Fuck Buddy's house at the wee hours of the morning to get laid! All in the name of sex... I swear the things I will do"

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"

I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken -- and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived. -Margaret Mitchell

Unconditional Love Is Wishing One The Best in Love, Life, & Happiness, Even If It's Not With You.

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr Seuss

Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh unconditionally, and never regret anything that made you smile.

"Do not go where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path, and leave a trail." -Emerson

"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today." -James Dean

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Something lingering

It's nice to have the house to myself every once in a while. I will admit though, if I lived there alone on a consistent basis, I would prefer something a lot smaller. There are a lot of nooks and crannies in my house and I'll admit, the imagination got the best of me last night. As I crawled into bed continuing to study, I heard the trees creek outside. We've been sleeping with the balcony door open so that the dogs may bark at the deer. Strange if you ask me, but so far, it's kept the deer out of the newly planted yard.

As I laid there, light music in the background, I heard the bustle of wind outside. It isn't the wind that is scary though. It's the thought of what is lurking in the shadows. We recently wired almost the entire house with cameras. I should feel safer, but the opposite happens. I tend to feel a bit lonely, and nervous. It's nice to have the dogs around, but given the area I live, it's quite dark outside. When they start barking, I'm not sure if it's something to worry about or just a deer. I leave my door open so that the dogs may roam in and out of my room. It makes the room seem larger than it is and more open. It's almost uncomfortable. There's something strangely comforting about having the door closed. You feel safer.

My brother returned home a little before 11 pm, so tonight it shouldn't be as dark and dim.

Monday, July 02, 2007

14 Days

2 weeks = 14 days = 336 hours = 20,160 minutes. This is how much longer I have to study. In some cases it'd be better to get the test over tomorrow, but in others, I find I still need to brush up on my probability including permutations and combinations. Once upon a time there were cool calculator keys that did the computation for you as long as you could figure out the correct numbers to plug in. Unfortunately, we aren't allowed to use calculators on this test.

I also realized today that I definitely need to go over some "GMAT" grammar. It's written that way because it isn't exactly the same as your everyday grammar. I would say that I am a fairly good writer. I often use transition words, more out of habit than conscious effort. I try to cut out the "crap" and make sentences concise. I proofread a lot of material at work before it goes to press. My boss often takes whatever suggestions I make as well. However with all the "GMAT" grammar I've studied. I find that I second guess sentences more than I used to. I'm always trying to figure out if it's the correct structure, verb tense, transition etc.. I feel like I almost knew English better before I started studying for this stupid test. I call it stupid because I'm ready to have it done.

The Fourth of July is on Wednesday and as much as I would love to go out and socialize, I need to prioritize. Something that as much as I've been doing, I've managed to have one too many 5 am nights. I will have my nose in a book and wll stop by the gym. Hopefully these days fly by and the information sinks in... dinner and books.